Free Writing

This is all free-writing right now. I'm not sure why I'm posting so much in the last day and half. (I just finished up with three notes on Facebook). But yeah, I'm extremely tired, and I probably should go to bed, but it just feels like I should be writing something.

Have you ever had that itch in your fingers to have a pen in your hand or your fingertips running across a keyboard? Maybe that's just me. I like words and seeing them form as my hand dances across the page. I know this sounds weird. It's 1:00 in the morning, and I have to get up in about seven hours. I've been up since 7:00 yesterday morning. I'm a tired kid.

Although, I did take a nap. I find myself taking several a week. I love naps. They're pretty awesome. I think I've taken more naps in college than I have when I was a little kid. I really, really like naps...a lot.

So, I've definitely been trying to get some graphic design stuff done to put up here. I really want to do a design for Love146. The link's on the side. Check it out. I think that it caught my attention because child trafficking is more than just an "issue." It's people. It's girls my age who are suffering and who need to know true love.

Wow...that's hard to come by nowadays, isn't it? True love? Ahh...it's springtime (if I didn't already mention that...). And here at school, where our lovely motto is 'ring by spring,' it can get a little depressing sometimes. I was actually thinking about that the other day.

I guess I was thinking, "Man...I really want a boyfriend." I know...strangest thought coming from me (at least I think so). You see, I saw a bunch of couples around, and it was just that they obviously connected on some level.

And then I thought to myself, "Why did I come to college? To get a boyfriend? Really? No." I think I'm still struggling with trusting God. I think God reminded me that it's His timing and His will. And both of those are perfect because He is perfect.

I mean, I had an almost relationship that fizzled, but I knew that it was the right thing to not get into one. I knew that I wasn't ready, and God was (and is) still working in me. I thought about how much I just want to seek God while I'm in college.

If I find someone, then that's great. But they have nothing compared to my God. I mean...I was thinking about it and how God's loved me since before I was born. The person that I'm going to marry - God willing that I get married - well, they may not even know me now, and they certainly did not love me before I was born.

Weird how the "important" things of this life seem so trivial in an eternal perspective. I feel kind of self-righteous saying this (and I hate that fact), but I feel like God's going to do something big in my life. I really don't mean to boast about that because it really is all God doing it. I just have the privilege to be part of it.

I was talking to one of my friends - I really look up to her in so many ways - and we just got to talking about how we wanted to see the church start acting like the church. The church is the representation of Christ. I mean His Spirit does kind of live inside of us if we are believers. So, why aren't we acting like Jesus?

My eyelids are closing as we speak. So I'm signing off for the night.

Peace. Love. Jesus.